Monday, February 28, 2011

The Truth about My Blogging

Well hello! It's only been forever and a day since I've last posted.

Lots has happened.  Life happened.  For a week or so I was without a computer (ok, without my OWN computer)  I had my husband's of course.  But I took that week off to NOT blog.  And to be was great!

I feel guilty a lot being a new mom.  I get guilty when I put Kie in his swing longer than 10 minutes (no lie), I feel guilty when I nurse him to soothe him when he is crying, I feel guilty he now is paying attention to the TV and I turn it on to cartoons so I can perhaps put up the dishes from the night before.

I also feel guilty when I blog when he is awake and I also feel guilty when I blog when he sleeps.

I say that because I personally feel I should either be napping with him (though the days of napping during the day have almost been extinct) I also feel I need to use that time to be a good wife and do my wifey duties. --Like cleaning, folding, doing laundry, making myself presentable for my husband when he gets home, dusting, cleaning the bathrooms, vacuuming, mopping, doing yard work....or whatever it may be!

So yes, blogging--though I like it in some ways, also makes me feel bad in others.

I just feel that there are days when I need could be using my time better.

I read a lot of blogs. Ok, I USE to read a lot of blogs.  And some of the women out there in the blogging world seem to do it all!

They work full time jobs, have children, they cook and clean their houses and can also manage to be a sex kitten for their husbands! And not to mention cook a gourmet 4 course meal and do a little crafty project for the week!  Which is either added to their collection of beautiful things in their immaculate house OR just to show to other bloggers how talented they are.

Now I write that, in completely niceness.  It's hard to tell when people write what tone they are using!!!!

I am truly amazed by those women! I really am!  But, I'm not that woman.

I'm a new mommy that DOES prefer an immaculate house.  I do wish I was back to my pre-pregnancy size jeans.  I wish I was able to sport my bikini this summer.  I wish I was able to find time to be crafty, to sew my babies own clothes, make my own curtains or aprons or what have you!

 I wish I had time (and patience) to go to the grocery store and even more so to prepare the yummy meal while Kie sleeps soundly in his crib.  And I also wished he slept through the night, allowing me my MUCH needed beauty rest.  Because of course the next morning I'll be up at 5 am to run my 6 miles before I make breakfast for my husband who leaves for work (he is the CEO of a very big company here in town).  He also just works because he likes to, and not because we need the money.

Ah, actually writing that and re-reading it makes me laugh.  Because I wouldn't want that.

In reality, I'm a new mommy that washes her hair every other day.  I wear Victoria pants (thought I was going somewhere else with that didn't you!) I wear my hair in a pony tail because chances are Kie will either spit up in it, or he prefers to just pull it out in clumps.

I'm the new mommy that is lucky to cook a few meals a week (with much help from Hamburger Helper or from Costco ready meals).  I'm the new mommy that prefers to NOT look at my new cellulite but will definitely be using a spray can of tan to help hide those new dimples.  I will be the new mommy on the beach this summer rocking my sundresses rather than my skimpy bathing suits.

I'm the mommy that rarely wears makeup.  In fact, I only put it on once a week.

I'm the mommy that wants my baby to grow up in church.  But sometimes skips on the services because the baby refused to sleep the night before.

I'm the new mommy that sometimes stays in pjs all day (very blessed for this actually) and lays on the floor reading children books, making faces and rolling on blankets with my baby.

I'm the new mommy that probably could have more time in the day if I worked at it better.  If I used every moment that Kie occupied himself to either cook, clean or be crafty.  But I'm not.

I am not a lazy mommy.  I usually have a super clean house, a clean baby (diaper and clothes) and most days out of the week I find time to also be wearing clean clothes (have clean hair) and maybe even have exercised.  Of course my form of exercising means I'm pushing my running stroller around with my lil man.

I am the mommy that prays every night thanking God for  giving me another day of life.  Thanking God for the blessings.  Thanking God that he allowed me a child and a husband that I love.

I am the mommy that DOES wish I was perfect looking .  But rather have my bundle of joy then any model's body.  I'm also the mommy that has the husband that prefers my new bigger butt (excuse my honesty) and could care less if my body now dons a few scars and dimples that I didn't have before.

I'm the new mommy that snaps way too many pictures. (Be it good or bad.)

I'm the new mommy that kisses and smothers my son because I know my days of kissing and hugging will be cut short because babies grow up to be teenagers or also because life on earth does have a time stamp.

There are a million and one things that I WISH I could do.

 I wish there were more hours in a day and that I didn't require sleep.  But, I'm no machine!

I realize some moms out there are machines! I cannot say how amazed I am by yall!  From the moms with more than one child, to mommies that work full time and raise kids, to the wives out there that are able to do it all...yall are awesome!  I need a lesson! (Seriously, feel free to email me with some pointers!)

Well, my little man is waking up from his milk coma.

I do promise to update on these past few weeks.

From BLUE MAN GROUP, our date night out, to having the MIL in town, to me playing Cupid this last weekend, to Valentine's...whoa, lots to catch up on!

Until next time,


1 comment:

  1. LOVE that picture of yall. You are precious Halley.. AND SUCH A WONDERFUL MOMMY!!!! I am just so happy for you !!!! <3 you!


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