Wednesday, December 19, 2012

prayers and more

It's been a hard few days...
as every web page, Facebook status, tweet or what have you has been covering the news and their thoughts/views on last Friday's awful and heart-breaking tragedy in Newton, CT.
I have little to say, but a lot has been going on in my mind and heart.
As a Christian woman, I can't lie and say my faith hasn't wavered, because it has.
I wish I could say I still feel comfortable in this world of ours, but I don't.
I know as a Christian, I need to be a leader, a light, a positive force in this world.
But, I've been broken and questioning so many things, just as so many others have.

I know as a mother, I need to lead and be brave for my children as well.
But, like many--many parents, I was a loss of words...
I was sickened..
I still am.
My heart breaks daily.
I can't even begin to fathom the pain these families are dealing with, nor do I want to.

I do know I've prayed a lot.
I've prayed for understanding.
Of forgiveness..
For peace for these families.
I've said a million thank yous for my blessings...
and it has kept me grateful during my 'tough times' during the day.
Like when my toddler doesn't listen, 
or when the toddler who continues to throw his toys, blocks and remotes that may hit me or his brother accidentally...
I'm reminded how lucky I am to have these moments.
Or, when I'm tired and worn out from sleepless nights with a newborn,
I now wake up grateful I get to be woken by a baby.
That I have a baby to hold, to love, to kiss, to sniff, to snuggle...
For now, I have these moments.
I am lucky. 
I'm grateful.
I'm humbled...
and forever reminded how short and precious life can be.

God, my sweet merciful Lord,
I ask for peace for these families that are suffering.
Lord, I pray that You hold these parents, siblings, grandparents, teachers, classmates...all of them, so very close to you. 
Hold their hands, their hearts and wipe their tears.
Dear God, I pray You show them Your love is still there,
that You give them comfort and understanding.
Dear God,
I thank You for being here for us all.
Thank You for the good we still have in this world from You.
Thank you for bringing so many of us together, for opening our eyes to the heroes that are among us.
Please, stay with us in this world.
Stay with us, Dear God...because we desperately need You.
I pray You heal our country, guide our leaders,
and that You show us where to go, direct our paths and our hearts.
Thank You for Your unwavering grace

In Christ name,

Now, a few pictures of my loves...
I did a little photo session with Kix in his Le Petit Prince onesie that my dear friend, Juli gifted me.
I have a long history with Le Petit Prince :)
My grandmere is French (Meme) and I took 4 years of French in high school, also with Julie.
 Le Petit Prince was one of the books we read a few times.
I also took French in college for 3 years.
I'm in love obsessed with the French language and culture.
So when I got this onesie in the mail, it truly made my week!

Also, a little background on the quilt.
It was my grandfather's.
He got it in a barter (a trade) from work.
He was a dentist (like my father) and a woman couldn't pay for her root canal so she gave him this quilt  as payment back in the 70's.
My Papa was a very generous man and money wasn't something he ever treasured. In fact, he gave away more free work and money than anyone I know.
He believed in giving---and he was a missionary.
My grandfather was an interesting and exceptional man in many ways. 
 My grandfather has been gone for 15+ years, so when I found this quilt with the note attached to it--I just had to have it.
It was just sitting in a linen closet at my parents.
So it's a very special quilt for me.

until next time,

My other Little Prince :)

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